I hoist myself onto the truck the way a crane carefully lifts a 700-pound corpse from a bed that hasn’t been unoccupied for years. I then attempt to step to the loading dock and fail immediately, realizing that my stumpy legs will not stretch that far.

OMG this made me laugh. I can relate. I just walk down to the loading dock stairs and take the stairs and walk back to the truck. 40 years ago it was no problem. Today, no way.